Today I was going to meet my father, and I decided to ride my bike, even if it was a long distance (a part of my project of trying to exercise this summer, lols). So I put on some music from my “Life” playlists, the weather was great, the birds were singing and whatnot. The “Life” playlist consists of songs with the feeling “Life is wonderful!!!” and it is! There are a few things I need to do to make my life the way I want it to be, but I’m happy with it. Well, anyway, the way to get to where we were going to meet (We don’t meet all that often, sadly…) is tough, there are so many uphills which are long, but I just went over them without stopping. I must have rid a long distance before I decided to drink some water because it was hot, but I didn’t feel tired at all. I stopped under a bridge since it was cool because there was shadow. I took my water-bottle out of my bag and was going to drink when I suddently felt dizzy. I tried leaning on the bridge, but I couldn’t see ANYTHING, and I blacked out, on top of my bike… I was thinking “Oh, snap, I have to get up, I can’t let anyone see me like this, they’ll call an ambulance or something like that” So I managed to roll over into a sitting position. I felt like I was gonna throw up, and I felt a ringing sound in my head. It sounded just like… You know, when you watch anime… There are cicadas crying. You’ve heard it for sure, in Evangelion, in Higurashi (Obviously, wahah.) and many others. That’s what it sounded like. And it kept going for minutes!
There was this man passing by who said “Nice place to take a break!” and I was like “Yes, it is! ^^” although I felt like I was gonna throw up if I opened my mouth. Hah, I managed to get to my destination pretty quickly though. I definitely have to increase my stamina level again. This means swimming, pilates, jogging and biking throughout this summer! I hate how lazy I’ve become. I read somewhere that fat gathers around your waistline when stressing, and I know now that it’s true. After I quit gymnastics, stressed around with that stupid XXX named XXXXXXXXX, school and no exercise, and lots of unhealthy but easy food I gained weight, and there is where it shows. It makes me sick, and it stresses me out even more. Seriously, today I downloaded Takitty’s photobook, and I couldn’t even enjoy it because I was thinking “Wow, Takahashi is so skinny…” And don’t mistake me for a pervert, I just really like the proportions in the PB’s, and especially the pictures of random things, like the clover in the glass of water (In Takahashi’s PB, pic 23). Anyway, it sucks so bad, because I was watching through the tape in my video-camera, and there was me and my friend Eva jumping on her trampoline last summer, in bikinis. We had a water fight with the garden hose (OMG, i’m STARTING to sound like a pervert! D:) and I looked like half the person I am. I know, if you’re reading this you’re probably sick of hearing about me complaining about this, but I’m really worried about it. I’m stressing about what I’m eating, and I even envied that person in the class below me who has anorexia… Man, she’s thin. I’ll stop now. Gahhh, I’m so stupid!
